Friday, February 13, 2009

It's more then just taking your eyes off ...

... It's putting them on ... on Christ that is.

Happy Valentine's day everyone!! (Happy Single's awareness day ... as my sister and I joke).

May all you married peeps enjoy having someone to hold tight and love and give your heart to. :) May all you peeps with a special someone also enjoy being together and enjoy each other's company. May all you singles out there .... hummm ... is there really anything to enjoy on Valentine's day for singles?

Yes!! As a matter of fact there is. Sometimes it doesn't seem that there is much to be thankful for and enjoy (especially when one of your greatest desires is to be married and live in oneness with your husband) when you're alone on the holiday that makes so much of that 'special someone' and you haven't that 'special someone'. And it seems harder still when you have friends and family that have 'special someones' :) and you don't.

So, what is there to be thankful for on Valentine's day? Well, there's always the famous 'you're alive aren't you?' question. (Well, at least I'm assuming that if you're reading this then you're alive ... but I guess I could be wrong. *wink*) But sometimes, if you're like me, that doesn't bring the joy and peace that you're looking for.

Instead of spending your time, thinking of how lonely you are, think of someone else. Send a card, write a letter, bake a cake and deliver it to someone (single or married). Call up another single friend and get together for the day. When we set our loneliness and sadness aside and open our eyes and truly look at other people and ask ourselves how we can help them, we see that there is so much we can do, even if it's something little like bringing a rose to someone just because.

Well, I've been thinking a lot lately about marriage, being alone (especial with Valentine's day), taking my eyes off of things I can't have (namely a companion), looking to Christ to be my all in all, letting go of my desires and longings, looking to Christ to be my all in all, letting go of my desires and longings, looking to Christ to be my all in all, letting go of my desires and longings ... and ... ummm ... looking to Christ to be my all in all and letting go of my desires and longings. Did I miss anything? Humm. I don't think so, I think I got 'em all.

If you've been a longtime reader of my blog you know I post quite a bit about letting go of my desires and longings. How much it hurts, how I don't want to let go, how I know I need to let go. But, as I've said, I've been thinking. Maybe there's more. How so? More then just "letting go". How so? Maybe it's not so much letting go as it is grasping tighter ... to something else.

Have you ever had a time in your life when you try and try to not think of something (or someone ... we're going with someone, being Valentine's and all), but the more you try not to think of them, the more you think of them? Kind of distressing if you ask me. But, maybe instead of trying not to think of 'someone' we need to think about Christ.

Back to letting go ... instead of trying so very, very hard to let go of desires and dreams, and someones, we should grip tighter and tighter to Christ. Because when our hands are full of Christ and holding tight to Him with all we have, we soon see that we have no extra space to hold onto someone else, and no need to let go, because our hands are completely filled with Christ. Same with our thoughts. If our thoughts are saturated with Christ, verses, songs of praise, and such, there won't be any thoughts about not thinking about someone. And if our minds are filled with Christ there won't be any room for thoughts of that someone.

It's kind of like stepping into a dark room with only a single candle to light the room. Your object, with said candle, is to make the darkness flee, to make it simply light in the room. But as you chase the darkness from one corner you turn to find that it simply moved to the corner behind you. You run from place to place with your candle trying to make the darkness leave, but it only follows behind you, wherever you go. Discouraged that the darkness remains you're not as careful as you should be with your candle flame and in your hurrying about you forget to protect the flame, to nurture it and it is blown out by such fast, desperate movements. Now completely in the dark you sink to the ground ... still in the darkness, still wishing it to be gone. As tears flow your heart gets heavier and heavier. You don't know what to do, you've tried and tried to make the darkness go away, but you just can't. What if you can never make it go away, what if you are to live the rest of your life fighting the darkness with only your little flame? Fear starts to fill your heavy heart. Suddenly a strong hand closes around your shoulder. You cannot see who it is that is touching you, but the touch brings peace and you feel no reason to be afraid. Then the words, "Arise, and do not be afraid*" are spoken in a soft, comforting tone. Tears still streaming down your face you take heart, somewhat, and find you have no strength to stand, but the matter is soon solved as you are lifted by strong able arms to your feet. But once on your feet your find the strong arms do not let you go, but hold you fast, strong, close. Still the identity of this man is not revealed but as your legs will not hold your weight you cling to this man. Your fists full of his shirt, the candle you once depended on is now fallen from your hands, forgotten in the darkness. "Who are you?" your soft whisper fills the dark room. Slowly a soft glow fills the space around you. It takes you a moment to realize that the man you're clinging to tightly to is beginning to glow. Slightly afraid you know not what to do. Slowly the glow brightens and brightens. It continues to brighten until you must shut your eyes at the brightness of it. You blink, stunned by the light. Once your eyes adjust to the majesty of the light you look at the one who still holds you so close. Your eyes then behold the Savior. His face is soft, tender, caring as He holds you close to His heart. As you look into His face your fears fade away as your mind is completely taken up with studying His features. A few moments pass before you reluctantly let your eyes wander from His face and you realize that the room around you is no longer dark. In fact, there is not even a trace of darkness for all is revealed by the holy, majestic glow of the Savior. You wonder, as you rest safely in His arms, how you could have even tried to disperse the darkness with simply a single flame all on your own.

When our minds are filled with Christ, (with the light of His holy majesty) there is no room for anything else. When our eyes are so focused on Christ, learning about and studying Him, there is nothing else to look at. When our hands are so full of holding tightly to Christ, the "candle" we used to guide our way falls from our hands ... for there is no room to hold to anything but Christ.

*Matthew 17:7 (NKJV)

For further thoughts see my series from last year: Single for Valnetine's day? Parts: 1- Choose, 2- You're Being Watched, 3- Surrender, 4- Submit, and 5- The Checklist.

4 comments:

Sydney said...

WOW, Ana! Thank you so much for this post...I needed to hear that. I've been dealing with this some quite recently.

Shalom! :)

Rosebud said...

Wow, Ana...that was so good. Thanks for the encouragement to focus on holding on to Christ instead of just letting go of people.

Jason A. Hunsicker said...

This is my favorite Part...

"Back to letting go ... instead of trying so very, very hard to let go of desires and dreams, and someones, we should grip tighter and tighter to Christ. Because when our hands are full of Christ and holding tight to Him with all we have, we soon see that we have no extra space to hold onto someone else, and no need to let go, because our hands are completely filled with Christ. Same with our thoughts. If our thoughts are saturated with Christ, verses, songs of praise, and such, there won't be any thoughts about not thinking about someone. And if our minds are filled with Christ there won't be any room for thoughts of that someone."

This is so hard to do. People keep telling me, that as soon as I stop looking and just focus on loving God, and allowing Him to love me, that the right one will come along, but that is really hard to do.

Thank you so much for these words of encouragement!

Ana said...

Jason~
Thank you for your comment. It was very encouraging to me. I know what you mean about people telling you to stop looking and then God will bring someone but, like you said, it's so very, very hard. But I'm learning to cling to Christ. I'll be praying for you, I know how hard it is!