Friday, February 29, 2008

Encouragment from a Friend

I received an e-mail from a good friend the other day and I was so encouraged with what she said that I just had to share it with all you single ladies out there!! So, be encouraged! :)

"...helping other single young ladies as they wait for either God's man or perfect will for their lives. A quote that a friend of mine told me once -although I know I'm not going to say it exactly accurate so I'll paraphrase- is that, "A woman should be so completely lost in God that a man would have to be completely lost in God to claim her attention." It is something along those lines, but the point is to not focus on getting married or even to be waiting for the right prince to come along, but to solely strive to give God the preeminence in every aspect of life. Yes, most girls desire to be a wife, but even marriage does not satisfy a believer's deepest longing. A lesson that I am still learning is that my first priority -and it should be my first desire- is to glorify my Father. If He decides to bless me beyond my first desire, it is His good pleasure and not my selfish wants. I know that it seems like it must be easy for me to say all this now that I am married, but to be honest, now is when I'm learning these lessons, or should I say - taking them to heart.
If I could challenge young single ladies now that I see the other side of the picture I would say that God created us for His glory and His purpose. I have no right to set my demands before Him, although in His mercy He hears my prayers. Lord, if you want me to be single, I will praise you in awe of your perfect will, and if you want me to be married, I will likewise praise you in awe!
A quote that my previous Sunday school teacher quoted from the book "My Utmost for His Highest" is, "Wait on God and He will work, but don't wait in spiritual sulks because you cannot see an inch in front of you." She also gave us the verse Philippians 4:8 which talks about what we think on. Whatsoever things are true, honest, just, pure, lovely, of good report... these are the things that should occupy my thoughts. There is always a lot of talk about being the Proverbs 31 woman for our future marriage, but does that not also mean that we should strive for that in singleness as well? ... At times it seems like such information can be overwhelming and discouraging (if looked at from the wrong perspective) at the prospect of how far there still is to go, but truly it is a worthy and worth-while goal!"

Thank you Charity! I was so encouraged again as I reread your e-mail. Thank you for letting me post it!

Thursday, February 28, 2008

*~* Miss Jane Day *~*

One morning, very soon after the dinner at the Musgroves, at which Anne had not been present, Captain Wentworth walked into the drawing-room at the Cottage, where were only herself and the little invalid Charles, who was lying on the sofa.

The surprise of finding himself almost alone with Anne Elliot, deprived his manners of their usual composure: he started, and could only say, "I thought the Miss Musgroves had been here -- Mrs. Musgrove told me I should find them here," before he walked to the window to recollect himself, and feel how he ought to behave.

"They are up stairs with my sister -- they will be down in a few moments, I dare say," -- had been Anne's reply, in all the confusion that was natural; and if the child had not called her to come and do something for him, she would have been out of the room the next moment, and released Captain Wentworth as well as herself.

He continued at the window; and after calmly and politely saying, "I hope the little boy is better," was silent.

She was obliged to kneel down by the sofa, and remain there to satisfy her patient; and thus they continued a few minutes, when, to her very great satisfaction, she heard some other person crossing the little vestibule. She hoped, on turning her head, to see the master of the house; but it proved to be one much less calculated for making matters easy -- Charles Hayter, probably not at all better pleased by the sight of Captain Wentworth, than Captain Wentworth had been by the sight of Anne.

She only attempted to say, "How do you do? Will not you sit down? The others will be her presently."

Captain Wentworth, however, came from his window, apparently not ill-disposed for conversation; but Charles Hayter soon put an end to his attempts, by seating himself near the table, and taking up the newspaper; and Captain Wentworth returned to his window.

Another minute brought another addition. The younger boy, a remarkable stout, forward child, of two years old, having got the door opened for him by some one without, made his determined appearance among them, and went straight to the sofa to see what was going on, and put in his claim to any thing good that might be giving away.

There being nothing to be eat, he could only have some play; and as his aunt would not let him tease his sick brother, he began to fasten himself upon her, as she knelt, in such a way that, busy as she was about Charles, she could not shake him off. She spoke to him -- ordered, intreated, and insisted in vain. Once she did contrive to push him away, but the boy had the greater pleasure of getting upon her back again directly.

"Walter," said she, "get down this moment. You are extremely troublesome. I am very angry with you."

"Walter," cried Charles Hayter, "why do you not do as you are bid? Do not you hear your aunt spake? Come to me, Walter, come to cousin Charles."

But not a bit did Walter stir.

In another moment, however, she could herself in the state of being released from him; some one was taking him from her, though he had bent down her head so much, that his little sturdy hands were unfastened from around her neck, and he was resolutely borne away, before she knew that Captain Wentworth had done it.

Her sensations on the discovery made her perfectly speechless. She could not even thank him. She could only hang over little Charles, with most disordered feelings. His kindness in stepping forward to her relief -- the manner -- the silence in which it had passed -- the little particulars of the circumstance -- with the conviction soon forced on her by the noise he was studiously making with the child, that he meant to avoid hearing her thanks, and rather sought to testify that her conversation was the last of his wants, produced such a confusion of varying, but very painful agitation, as she could not recover from, till enabled by the entrance of Mary and the Miss Musgroves to make over her little patient to their cares, and leave the room. She could not stay. It might have been an opportunity of watching the loves and jealousies of the four; they were now all together, but she could stay for none of it. It was evident that Charles Hayter was not well inclined towards Captain Wentworth. She had a strong impression of his having said, in a vext tone of voice, after Captain Wentworth's interference, "You ought to have minded me, Walter; I told you not to teaze your aunt;" and could comprehend his regretting that Captain Wentworth should do what he ought to have done himself. But neither Charles Hayter's feelings, nor any body's feelings, could interest her, till she had a little better arranged her own. She was ashamed over herself, quite ashamed of being so nervous, so overcome by such a trifle; but so it was; and it required a long application of solitude and reflection to recover her.

~Persuasion (with original spelling)
The picture used in this post was found at Solitary Elegance.

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Help me with Jane quotes

As I've said in a previous post, I'm going to try to post a scene of Jane Austen once a week. But it would make me so very happy to have every one help me!! Tell me your favorite quote in a comment or e-mail me at I'm not exactly 100% sure what I'm going to do, but if you all tell me your favorite scene as "nsowers" has done in the comments for this post then I've thought of making a list of the scenes people like and posting them according to the average liking. :) But if the scene you send me is more then just, "My favorite scene is ..." and you actually send me the whole scene (as I've posted a whole scene) then I'll post it here for a Jane Day!

I would love for you all to help out!! Looking forward to see what I'll have for the list and posting scenes from you all!!

Friday, February 22, 2008

Kale Soup

*3 slices bacon, cut up
*4 large onions, sliced (6 C.)
*4 C. water
*1 quart tomatoes (2 C.)
*8 C. washed, trimmed and cut up Kale (approx. 8oz.)
*8 oz. linguisa sausage or Kielbasa, thinly sliced
*4 C. finely chopped potatoes (1 1/2 lbs.)
*1 15 1/2 oz can kidney beans
*1 tsp. vinegar
*1/2 tsp. salt
*1/4 tsp. pepper
*Dash of bottled hot pepper sauce (2 drops tobasco sauce)

**In a Dutch oven, cook the bacon and onions until onions are tender. Add water, tomatoes, Kale and sausage or Kielbasa. Bring mixture to a boil and reduce heat. Gently boil, covered, for 15 minutes. Add potatoes and undrained kidney beans. Bring to a boil. Cover and boil gently for 15 minutes more. Stir in vinegar, salt, pepper, and hot pepper sauce. Cover and simmer soup for 30 minutes.

***Kale is most abundant in grocery stores during winter. Look for small bunches with no yellow or limp leaves. Wash leaves in cold water, pat dry, remove the stems and trim bruised leaves. Store Kale in a paper towel-lined plastic bag in the refrigerator up to 3 days. Longer storage may cause the leaves to take on a bitter taste.

***Linguisa is an uncooked, smoked sausage of Portuguese origin. Kielbasa is a cooked, smoked sausage also known as Polish sausage.

Thursday, February 21, 2008

*~* Miss Jane Day *~*

The morning hours of the Cottage were always later than those of the other house; and on the morrow the difference was so great, that Mary and Anne were not more than beginning breakfast when Charles came in to say that they were just setting off, that he was come for his dogs, that his sisters were following with Captain Wentworth, his sisters meaning to visit Mary and the child, and Captain Wentworth proposing also to wait on her for a few minutes, if not inconvenient; and though Charles had answered for the child's being in no such state as could make it inconvenient, Captain Wentworth would not be satisfied without his running on to give notice.

Mary, very much gratified by this attention, was delighted to receive him; while a thousand feelings rushed on Anne, of which this was the most consoling, that it would soon be over. And it was soon over. In two minutes after Charles' preparation, the others appeared; they were in the drawing-room. Her eye half met Captain Wentworth's; a bow, a curtsy passed; she heard his voice -- he talked to Mary, said all that was right; said something to the Miss Musgroves, enough to mark an easy footing: the room seemed full -- full of persons and voices -- but a few minutes ended it. Charles shewed himself at the window, all was ready, their visitor had bowed and was gone; the Miss Musgroves were gone too, suddenly resolving to walk to the end of the village with the sportsman: the room was cleared, and Anne might finish her breakfast as she could.

"It is over! it is over!" she repeated to herself again, and again, in nervous gratitude. "The worst is over!"

Mary talked, but she could not attend. She had seen him. They had met. They had been once more in the same room!

Miss Jane Journal!

A few weeks ago I went and picked myself up a journal. This journal was to be my Miss Jane Journal. I knew exactly what I was looking for. And I found it! My Miss Jane Journal will hold everything Miss Jane-ish. My favorite characters, my favorite quotes, my favorite scenes, etc.. I think I have resolved (we will see :)) to each week share one of my favorite quotes/scenes from my Miss Jane Journal. They are just the ones I can remember and not necessarily the best of the book, since I just started my journal and I'm trying to think through the books of Miss Jane's that I've read and trying to remember my favorite parts. If you have favorite parts of her books let me know! I'd love to know!

Monday, February 18, 2008

New Book

I just finished (literally just, I just closed it and put it down) finished Mansfield Park. I loved it!! Just as much as Persuasion. Not more and not less, just differently, but I loved it! My heart was stolen by little Fanny Price the first moment she was mentioned in the book. I grew and learned with her, I loved with her (I myself was quite attached to Edmund :) ), I cried with her, my heart broke with her, my joy overflowed with her and my heart was happy with her! I really recommend this book to all who are in need of a good book to read.

I watched the Masterpiece Theatre version of Mansfield Park and although I utterly enjoyed the movie, and believe I still will when I watch it again, the book was so much different the their movie!

My next endeavor shall be Pride and Prejudice. I have watched different movie versions of it, so I know what will happen, but I can't wait to see how Miss Jane really wanted it to be!

Thursday, February 14, 2008

More very good links!

Single for Valentines Day?: Part 5 ~The Checklist~

So here we are, Valentine's Day has come and gone, and the days for posting my first ever blog series are past! (What a fun experience it has been to write my first blog series and to get the responses from different people. Thank you!)

So I'd like to close this series with a post entitled "The Checklist". So here we go!

This Valentine's Day did you ...

  1. Choose to be happy? Choose to think of others first? Choose to make the day wonderful and special for the others around you?
  2. Check your attitude and actions? Because people watched you as you went through another Valentine's Day alone. What did you show them? Did you show them your joy in God? Did you show them the trust that you have in Christ that everything will work out for good in His time?
  3. Surrender your wishes, desires, wants, passions, your all to Christ? Did you give Him everything and are now content to wait and see what His plan is for you ... joyfully and happily?
  4. Submit to the way God has planned your life for right now and happily accept that God's way is perfect? Did you submit to being single for no matter how long and choose to be happy in that time?
Now I don't need to know how you all did, but you need to be completely honest with yourself about everything. Don't go, "Well, I was happy for two whole seconds but the rest of my day was doom and gloom, but I think that counts as choosing to be happy." Ahhh, no, that doesn't count. ;) But also, as you are checking off your list I want you to apply it, not only to Valentine's Day, but to everyday of the year, so that when Valentine's Day rolls by again, and perhaps your still single, your struggle will not be as great if you've been practicing these things (and other good helpful things). It will become a habit, if you do it often enough. And if you're in the habit of doing all these things, you won't have to wonder how to make it through another Valentine's Day without doom and gloom!

Thank you all for tuning in and reading and commenting and encouraging! It's been really fun!!

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Coming Soon...

... the last post of my Single for Valentine's Day? series.

The checklist is up next in my series. Stay tuned and I will try to get at the computer as soon as I can!!

Happy Valentine's Day to all if I don't post before then!!


I received a comment from a young lady wishing to know my views of college and I thought maybe this question is on some of your minds as well.

Here is her comment:

I just recently found your blog via Ashleigh's. Thanks for taking the time to write this Valentine's series :o) I also like your pictures...where do you find all of them? Especially the one with the little girl looking into the goldfish bowl!

And I have a are single, teaching piano lessons? Did you go to college? I am a single woman (21) and in school right now pursuing an Early Childhood Education degree. I have struggled with whether or not to pursue a college degree. It seems to just make my life so BUSY...what with work (I nanny) and going to school, and I know that what I am doing now is cultivating what my life will be like in the future...and I don't want my life to be so busy and harried in the future when I am a wife and mother (if God brings me that desire of my heart). Just wanted to know your thoughts on this, whether you went to college, etc...


My Reply: (I published this as a comment but I have changed or added a word here and there from the original comment).

Believe me, it is my pleasure to write a series on my blog if it is at all helpful to anyone at anytime of life! I'm just glad the Lord is so choosing to use it!

To be honest with you, I've found my pictures from various sites and blogs. I believe the little girl and the fishbowl was found on "A Wise Women Builds Her Home" linked on my side bar. (The link to the picture is: )

Yes, I am single, living in my parents home and teaching piano. I have decided, with my parents, to not attend college of any kind. I am still taking piano lessons and the education I get from my very, very advanced teacher, is equal to what I could receive in a college setting, only at a far less cost! I understand completely that college life combined with "regular" life would be VERY busy. And I guess, since I am teaching piano and learning to be a wife and mother (rather preparing to be) throwing college into the mix would make my life very busy too.

I have decided not to attend college for a few reasons:

1. The only reason I would go to college is to have a degree in teaching so that, if I am blessed by God with marriage and children, no one can say I'm not capable of teaching my own children at home because I have no degree.

2. My greatest desire is to be a stay at home mom and wife and nothing in college (even Christian college) could equip me for that role better than my mother!

3. To me, it seems, if my life's desire is to be a stay at home mother and wife and I go to college and major in something completely off that track and I do end up getting married and being a stay at home mom then would all those years (not to mention dollars) go to waste?

4. I don't want my life to be so hurried and in such a rush all the time. It really is not very helpful for the one trying to live a peaceful, quiet life. And I understand no one has a completely quiet and peaceful life, but if I can cut some hurry and scurry out of my life by NOT going to college I will jump at that chance.

5. I want to be a stay at home mom, and if I go to college and am out of the home all day every day, then when/if I get married, staying at home would seem so strange to me and not only would it take time to get used to but it would be hard to be content with staying home when I'm used to running around. And I don't want that. I do realize that there are college classes on line and if you choose to take college that way then being out of the home would not apply there.

I hope I answered your questions. I greatly appreciate your willingness to comment/ask questions and then be willing to have an answer given! Please, if I haven't fully answered your questions, or if I have raised new ones. Please let me know, I'm more then happy to help you in anyway I can!

Single for Valentines Day?: Part 4 ~Submit~

Along with surrendering to Christ your all and your everything, as I talked about in my last post, you must submit to Him.

Submitting to His plan, knowing, and truly believing, that His way is best. Submitting to whatever happens!

Transitive Verb:
  1. To yield or surrender (oneself) to the will or authority of another.
  2. To subject to a condition or process.
  3. To commit (something) to the consideration or judgment of another.
Intransitive Verb:
  1. To give in to the authority, power, or desires of another.
  2. To allow oneself to be subjected to something.
Willingly placing your life in God's hands, and letting go. Happily accepting whatever God brings into your life, waiting or not waiting for the man you dream of.

It's not always easy to submit, just as submitting to our parents isn't always easy, but we submit, because we love God, and because we know that He knows better then us. God has planned all, from beginning to end and we, at this point in time, only see a small portion of what's going on, and at times, we don't like what we see. Waiting is not really what any girl plans on when she wants to be married. But planned on or not, it is often what happens, and it's hard. But submitting to waiting, submitting to God's perfect plan, is something we can joyfully do! Submitting doesn't have to be a horrid thing. Joyfully submitting is what God wants us to do! It's not rolling your eyes and saying, "Okay, I have to submit, so here I go," and it's not "Well, I don't have any other choice. I really can't do anything to change how long I have to wait so I might as well submit." No, it's, "I know God's way is better then mine, and once I take my hands off and joyfully wait to see what He has planned, I can see my life unfold in ways I never even thought or dreamed of. God's ways are so much more wonderful then anything I could ever have worked out!"

Submitting to God means that you take your hands off of the things in life that you really have no control over, like how long waiting for a man, or what man will come into your life, etc.. But that doesn't mean, however, that you just sit back and say, "Well, whatever happens happens." On the contrary, although you submit to God and joyfully accept what He has planned, you must work at trusting, at loving (God, our family, and our future husband, although we don't know who he is just yet) at preparing for marriage, at making sure, even in this time of waiting and wondering, that you stay pure for our future husbands.

Submitting to God is not a scary thing. He is not waiting for us to submit and then, once we've taking our hands off, He will bring horror after horror of unspeakable things into our lives to make sure we're unhappy. No! God wants to bring us joy in Him! And He does that when we submit, when we desire what He wants, and when He gives us desires that please Him and then when He fulfills those desires that please Him.

A desire for marriage is a God given desire! He's not, once we submit, just going to leave us with this growing, unfulfilled desire. If the desire for marriage truly comes form God, He will fulfill it! It may take years and years to fulfill, but once we've submitted and surrendered, and have chosen to be happy, we won't mind the waiting!

So submit to our caring, compassionate, loving, gentle, all-seeing, all-knowing God, who does not make it His goal to make us sad and unhappy, but quite the opposite, and watch your life unfold in God's way, and be truly happy to accept anything He brings, and you will be happy!

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Single for Valentines Day?: Part 3 ~Surrender~

Surrender, does that word make you cringe? Or maybe roll your eyes, or maybe it makes you want to skip this post and find something a little more agreeable.

To be honest, who could blame you? Surrender, like give up? Like being vulnerable, like defenseless? In a sense ... yes!

But maybe we should ask, first, why do words like vulnerable and defenseless give us such a scare? If we are trusting God, if we've put our lives in His hands, isn't He capable of defending us if the need should arise? Why do we feel like we must defend ourselves, or not be vulnerable? God will take care of us, no matter what comes our way.

Surrender your single life, your hopes, your dreams, your passions, your desires, yourself to God and placing all in His able hands.

Maybe the thought, "And why would we do this?" is running through your head or maybe, "Been there, done that, it doesn't work."

Well, if so, then here we go. First: "And why would we do this?"

Why surrender, to be completely and utterly happy and at peace. To be tried, purified, to become the young woman God wants us to be. Surrendering our lives to God sometimes (most of the time) involves waiting and as young women who want to be married, that "wait" word scares us. But in that time of waiting, surrendering and being willing to wait, is part of how God shapes us and makes us into who He wants us to be. And in surrendering we learn to trust, not just in waiting for Mr. Right, but also for other things. Maybe after we're married we want children and God says we must wait, but we've learned from waiting for our husbands that God's way is always right and His time is perfect, never late, and never early.

How can you be happy by surrendering? Think of all the worry you could be rid of. Without waking up each morning thinking, "Another day alone? How will I get through it?" or, "Another day wondering where my prince is and wondering when he's going to ride into my view." And thus having your mind rid of worrying, your attitude will improve and you will be more pleasant to be around, and when people see that you're not sad and lonely on Valentines Day and they ask you why, you can say, "I surrendered my all to Christ, and I'm content to wait for His time in His way!" What joy that will bring to our hearts if we truly believe it!

When you surrender your life to God you are saying, "Lord, I need You, I can't do this. I trust You to do what You will in my life and I won't try to make things work out the way I want. I trust Your way is best, after all, you planned everything (even waiting for Mr. Right) and You're in control of everything (even bringing a man) You know what's going to happen, so why shouldn't I give You my life and just trust?"

And: "Been there, done that, it doesn't work."

First off I'd say if that's what you think, then maybe you didn't truly surrender. Once you've truly surrendered and let go (!), trusting God to work His perfect plan in our lives and His time, we will be happy and content.

If you've surrendered and you're still worried and discontent I urge you to rethink your surrendering!

Also, remember, we don't just do it once and then we're happily content to wait for Mr. Right for the rest of our lives. It must be a day by day thing and sometimes a moment by moment thing. And when you just can't surrender, tell Him! When the doubt creeps in and causes you to rethink trusting God, tell Him!

It's not a sin to have doubt creep in, it's a sin to believe it and act upon it because "Whatever is not of faith is sin."

So when you feel that you're starting to slip and question, call out, God will hear you and He will respond, if you're willing, and He will give you the strength to surrender and trust again.

This last part is a few of my own experiences I've put together and put in the form of a "conversation" between myself and God.

Me: Lord, I give you my life.
God: You won't be disappointed.
M: Yes, I know ... but what if You take a long time to bring me the man of my dreams, don't You think I should just do it myself? After all, I know what I'm looking for.
G: No.
M: But what if I let go and You bring someone that I think is ugly and someone I can't stand.
G: I work everything out for your good if you love and trust Me. My way and timing are perfect, it can't be wrong.
M: Lord, there is a man, he's asked about me and is interested in maybe courting, should I say yes and consider courting him? I don't know if I like him like that.
G: Don't do it.
M: But what if I say no and I lose my chance and never have a guy in my life?
G: Do you trust me?
M: Yes ... but ...
G: Am I not good?
M: Yes but ...
G: Do you trust me?
M: Yes! Lord I give You my life, my dreams, my worries, my passions, my desires, my all!
G: Surrender all to Me, moment by moment! You won't be disappointed.

Good links

Check out these links. I was so encouraged by them, and if you struggle with singleness then I hope you will enjoy and be encouraged by them too!!

Single for Valentines Day?: Part 2 ~You're Being Watched!~

You run a hand over your hair one last time to make sure nothing is going haywire and give a small smile when everything that meets your hands is just as it should be.

A short, round lady skitters up to you, armed and ready. With a few puffs of her make-up brush your face is once again covered almost beyond recognition, but you don't care, you're only thought is air!

Gasping for air the powder that hangs in the air around your face nearly chokes you. Soon the call is heard.

"Lights ..."

The lights dim and a spot light turns on, illuminating your form.

"Camera ..."

A thumbs up from the camera man makes your mind scramble for your line.


You freeze. All your lines just vanished from your mind.

You look desperately around. "Cut," you give a wave of your hand, "Cut!"

"Sorry, no can do," the voice of the stocky fellow behind the camera reaches your ear, slightly muffled.


Now, if you were really an actress and that happened to you, you would probably find some way to stop the camera and either cut that scene out or just start over from the beginning. But think of your life as being filmed. If you mess up in life, there's no, "Cut, I didn't say that right," or "Cut, my attitude was way off, can we try that again?"

What happens in your life is done, you can't change what happened. But there's hope! You can change what will happen; how you will act, speak, respond, think, etc..

People are watching, the cameras are rolling. What are they seeing? Anger at God for being single? An, "I don't know what God is doing and I don't care," attitude. An, "I don't need a man, I'm fine by myself," or maybe it's the other extreme ... "I'm so lonely, no body loves me," or "I'm never going to get married, I'm going to die alone," or "Doesn't any body care?"

Now perhaps those aren't the exact words, but what about the attitude?

People are watching you, unsaved and saved, young and old, friends and family. What are you showing them this Valentines Day ... or any day!

Are you showing how much you love your family, how much joy it gives you to think of others and not about how lonely you are? What happiness you get from serving and not lying around wishing you had a man?

And what example are you being to your sisters in Christ? Whether it's someone a lot older, someone just slightly older, someone your age, someone slightly younger, or someone a lot younger.

Especially for the younger (early teens and younger) girls, we, as older, single girls, need to set the example of what a single Christian girl is suppose to think about, talk about and how to act. As the little girls are just starting to figure this all out, don't give them the view of a sulking, hardhearted, angry at God single woman.

From my last post ... Choose to be happy, choose to show Christ, choose to be the right example!

Another thing we need to remember is that our attitude affects others. If we are lying around sulking, or if we're angry at God, not only will others see it, but it will affect every one around you! The way you, me, we (!) respond to singleness does, indeed, affect every one around you!

Be the right, Godly, example of a single Christian woman for all to see and watch, because they are watching!

Monday, February 11, 2008

Single for Valentines Day?: Part 1 ~Choose~

This post is the first one in a short series I hope to write called Single for Valentines Day? (if time permits)!

Reading one of my favorite blogs today I clicked on everyone of her links ... the two in this post, these two, and this one (I was particularly struck by this one). And as I was reading I was struck with how people are going about Valentines Day!

I have gone through the time in my life when I felt so lonely and sad (and at times I still do) because I didn't have a man. It didn't even have to be Valentines Day. Any holiday would get me down, sad, lonely and feeling sorry for myself. In fact it didn't have to be a holiday either, any day would be as good a day as any for me to sulk and be lonely. Any time I saw a couple together I was instantly sad and lonely.

To help "cure" my loneliness I would write stories and, in my stories, of course, there would be a girl and a boy, both lonely and sad, much like myself. In the story this and that would happen, they would meet, they would like each other and thus began the most romantic stories of all time.

And for a time I was happy, not quiet as lonely. I would take the joy my characters "experienced" and live my life with that joy ... for a day, at the most two.

So while waiting for another of the best love stories of all time to pop into my head I would read love story after love story from the library. Taking what joy I could from them as well.

But looking at it now, at all the time I felt lonely and sad, wondering if I was ever going to get married, I think: isn't loneliness a choice? I don't mean the actual state of being alone, I mean the choice to feel alone? You make the choice to love? So do you make the choice to feel lonely?

As Elizabeth suggested, let's be positive. But I'm going to change that just slightly. Let's not just be positive, let's choose to not be lonely, let's choose to be rejoicing, let's choose to be giving, let's choose to be loving, let's to choose be like Christ! Instead of thinking of what we, as unmarried Christian ladies, don't have, namely a man, let's choose to think instead of what we do have. And I won't lie, at times it's hard, so what do we do? Pray! God will give you the strength to do everything He has called you to do, even being single. Ask Him for the strength to choose to be happy, to choose to love Him and to choose to not be sad and lonely.

We have the best man we could ever want, one who is perfect in every way, who will never leave us lonely, who will never disappoint us (as human men can), who has given us His love, what else could we ask for? God has given us all we need for living to honor and glorify Himself right now, at the point in life that we are at ... all we need right now! If God saw that we could love and serve Him better with a man, don't you think we would already have that man?

So thinking about what we do have again we can remember ... we already have everything we need! Perhaps, it's not everything we want, but God knows what we need, when we need it. If He saw that we were ready for a man, as I've said before, we would have him. But if we don't have him, let us take this time to love Christ more, to rejoice in the time we have to learn more about Him and grow in Him, to submit to being tried, tested, purified, so that we become not only what God wants us to be, but so that we are shaped, more and more into the women that will be perfectly made for the man God has for us!

More to come...

Saturday, February 09, 2008

And so I have been thinking ...

... maybe I was (or better ... am) a little obsessed with getting married. Ever since I can remember I've always wanted to be married. When playing house I would meet the special man, he would sweep me off my feet, he would (of course!) talk to my "parents" (who would probably happen to be imaginary) and they would totally love the idea and my love and I would be married without a second thought (or to be more exact without a seconds thought. As I look back, my love and I married without any wedding planning or anything. The moment my "parents" said yes, **Poof** I was in a wedding dress and saying my vows. Funny how that works).

Barbies too. Never would my Barbies kiss unless they were engaged or married (because, don't you know, even if you're just a Barbie you must follow the "Do Not's" list (see below)). And the same storyline would be followed for Barbie as it was for playing house. (Of course it was always more romantic for Barbie because she actually had a man, Ken, (but I always changed his name to something more romantic) to fall in love with and she always had the best outfits to look her best when falling in love. *Sighs* Oh the joys of being a Barbie).

And that was just how my little mind worked, like I said, ever since I can remember, seriously. You would get married, that's what girls did. And I spent my time dreaming up the perfect man, the perfect time, perfect proposal, etc., etc.. And I knew all the "Do Not's" as well.

*Do not kiss a man until your married.
*Do not let him hold your hand.
*Do not let him touch you, except if it's a general handshake or an accident.
*Do not wear rings on "That" finger until your married, or until the man who has swept you off your feet puts it there.
*And so on and so forth.

But as my post title says, I've been thinking. And I'll tell you what started it all.

At church on Wednesday night I was talking to my dear little friend, L, she's, I believe, eight. She's a doll and very mature for her age as well. She knows stuff about just anything that sometimes blows me away. But anyway, back on track, she was looking at my rings, (I wear two: one on the middle finger of my left hand, and one on the ring finger of my right hand) and she was telling me that I should wear my rings on different fingers. She was holding my left hand and was pointing to the fingers that I should wear my ring on. She said I should wear it on my little finger, I said it was too small for the ring to stay on. She pointed to my ring finger, I mean "That" finger. My mind flew to the "Do Not's" list and I just looked at her with a smile and giggled a little, assuming she knew that no one would actually wear a ring on that finger, unless "said" things in "Do Not's" list happened.

She didn't. She just gave me her blank, "I don't understand what you're doing or talking about" look. And I've known her long enough to know when she's teasing and when she's not. And believe me she was not.

Quickly clearing my throat to cover up the giggle and wiping the smile off my face I just said simply. "No, I don't want to wear it on that one. That's the one for my wedding ring."

Again, a blank stare. "You have a wedding ring?" she questioned.

Now I felt really dumb. "No, I mean, if I ever get married, that's where I'll wear my ring. Have you noticed that's where your mom wears it?"

She shrugged and moved on to decide which other fingers I could wear my rings on.

But as she continued talking to me I kind of zoned out.

Am I just completely lost? Am I just so obsessed that I can't even thinking about anything else? Does everything have to be measured by the "Do Not's" list?

My sweet little girly didn't even know what I was talking about. She obviously had never even thought of "That" finger, or anything else in the romantic category before. She thinks about writing in her wonderful notebooks, drawing pictures, her coloring books, painting her fingernails, playing with her best friend, S, what kind of new recipe she and her mom will make next ... the stuff little girls are suppose to think about.

Thinking about it even more I realize I can take her unintentionally offered advice and get my mind off of the things of romance, love, perfect man, such and such.

But all that to say, it just really got me thinking. :) What do I think on during the day? How much do I focus on romantic, love things? And really, what should I be thinking about? I should be thinking how to better my relationship with God and with my family. Thinking of others as more important then myself, not zoning out in a day dream. Thinking of how I can serve others, not about who I'm going to marry. But, this is just me, thinking (writing) out loud.

Wednesday, February 06, 2008

"Products" of the shopping trip

One of my piano students is at the end of their books so I needed to run to the music store to buy them new books. And while there I decided to run to Wal-mart. At Wal-mart I picked up a few things ...

The Candy:
Skittles are for E ... Tart Sweethearts for Leah ... Chocolates for Mama ... Original Sweethearts for me (I wait all year for the Sweethearts!). I didn't get anything for Popi because he doesn't like candy and if he really needs something sweet he can just have some of our candies! :)

The Pattern/Craft/Project Binder:
I thought I should buy myself a little binder to put all of my crocheting patterns in, so I don't lose them. Look at the little, round elephant on the binder!! He's part of the reason I bought it. :)

The Lotion!!!!:
I love wonderful smelling lotion and the only lotion I had left in my lotion basket was from Bath and Body Works and that is too wonderful and too expensive to use every day. :) Yes, I'm weird. So I bought some cheaper stuff to use just whenever.

Monday, February 04, 2008


The rules for this meme are: (1) Link to the person that tagged you. (2) Post the rules on your blog. (3) Share six non-important things/habits/quirks about yourself. (4) Tag six random people at the end of your post by linking to their blogs. (5) Let each random person know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their website.

I was tagged by Elizabeth from Twenty Three and Soaring.

  1. I love purple ... bet you woulda never guessed. ;)
  2. I drink tea all day long, like seriously ALL day.
  3. I love to hand write things rather then typing.
  4. I really like chocolate.
  5. I love to cook and use spices to make yummy things.
  6. I love journals, both writing in them and just looking at beautiful ones (of which I have a nice collection).

And I tag ... Leah, Ash, Kat, Robert, Charity and my Popi


It's done!!! Looky!!! It's so beautiful. I love it!

The little silver clip is what I'm holding it together with in the front so I can do stuff with my hands rather then holding onto the shawl.

Saturday, February 02, 2008

As promised ...

Shawl pictures!!!
Here are the pictures I promised from yesterdays post! Enjoy.

For the pattern and other pictures and information, see previous post.Now:

Friday, February 01, 2008

Coming Soon!!!

A shawl up-date, complete with pictures!!! :) It's so big!! I'll be sure to post that ASAP!

He went anyway ...

::~In spite of all the years I would reject Him and turn away from Him ... He went anyway.
::~In spite of all the many times I would fall after I accepted His gift of salvation ... He went anyway.
::~In spite of the many times I would turn away, after salvation ... He went anyway.
::~In spite of the times when I would take matters into my own hands, rather then trusting ... He went anyway.
::~In spite of all the times I wouldn't stand for Him because of the pressure ... He went anyway.
::~In spite of all the times I just didn't get what I was suppose to learn ... He went anyway.
::~In spite of all the times I was unkind, unChrist-like ... He went anyway.
::~In spite of all the times I would sin, and still do ... He went anyway.
::~In spite of the times He knew I wouldn't love Him as I ought, and still don't ... Jesus went to the cross for me anyway!

The list goes on ... think about it!